Sometimes I am spoiled to have excruciatingly talented friends.
The sumbitches.
Actually, no. That would be to do them an injustice. They’re talented, granted. But are they successful in making awesome stuff just because they’re talented?
No. They’re talented and fucking committed.
They work hard at something not because they’re good at it, but because they want to get even better at doing it (and putting me to shame in the process).
I accept this.
Example: Take my friend Mike. The guy’s a wizard with a camera, was in a band so I suppose that makes him a musician and pulls creative musical compositions in Ableton by pulling them out of his ass.
Easily? No, I expect he gets writer’s block. Or whatever artists get.
Art block.
It doesn’t matter. Point is, he makes stuff. As do most people I know. Especially people I work with. Everyone has a 9-to-5 job and makes amazing things on the side.
I can’t do anything about not being talented. Hell, perhaps my talent is writing, or public speaking or (heaven forfend) stand-up comedy. What’s with hotels these days, huh?
SPEAKING OF HOTELS.
Currently, I am in an undisclosed location (London) doing REDACTED which is… well, suffice to say, verifying my view of my own identity. Having denied my geekiness and nerdery for so long, it’s nice to be able to finally admit it.
Why? Well, for a simple reason, really. Those that know me will kind of guess that about me anyway (it’s not a secret). Those that don’t will have to, well, deal with it, you know? If someone’s not keen on me because they think I’m too much of a nerd for them, then I’m sorry, but you’ll need to return to your homes and places of business, because I’m not going to dumb myself down, like I had to do for fucking ages.
At last, I can accept that yeah, I can come across as intimidating and so forth, but I’m a human being and I’m trying to keep a check on that. But if you don’t keep up, hard luck.
that people like Mike (and my other friends - he just happened to be last in my Firefox history) just get on with it. They don’t have a strategy. No books except maybe a few references, but no motivational horseshit.
This author is NOT QUALIFIED to talk about that. I have unread “self-help” books littering my abandoned and dusty desk. That says two things:
Evidence for number 2? This copy of Snow Crash, purchased in 2004 and NOT FINISHED. Started, yes, but not finished. Which is driving me nuts.
Facetiously, I joked that my new year’s resolution would be 1080p. Historically, I never carry out any threat to improve myself, but dammit, I’m trying. This two-week thing will change my career and allow me to just get on with it in the workplace. As far as the rest goes, viz. my personal life, we’ll have to see.
I see a massive failure in the distance in that regard. Hope to avoid it, but really can’t be certain. Previous attempts at shedding distraction, procrastination and general lack of motivation have been poor, perhaps, ironically, because of a lack of motivation to do anything about it, which I do realise is an entirely circular argument.
Don’t need tips.
Don’t need books.
Don’t need “life hacks”.
Do need friends.
Do need to do “stuff”.
Do need to feel fulfilled as an intelligent animal.
Would be nice to make something that I’m pleased with every now and again.
This post is very, very long, even by my standards and for that I apologise (especially to you, TL;DR brigade).
Maybe I’m depressed because I’m charging a computer from a hotel safe power outlet, or because I’m drinking instant fricking coffee out of a stick.
Probably not. I’m probably just bored and venting my frustration at no-one and nothing.
Whiner.
So I’m going to hit Create Post now, because that will at least let me make something and that will be a great first start, no matter how shitty people think it is.
To those that do: deal with it.
To those that like it: awesome. I’m probably friends with you already. If not, even better.
I understand that’s known as popularity in human society. I wouldn’t really know much about it. You can probably tell. But let’s embrace it. It might be the only thing going for me, considering an apparent vacuum of talent.
